It’s A Colorful One

April 18, 2013April 18, 2013 / amylynw / Leave a comment

When trampolines come back into daily play, and the fridge once again empties without notice, it is a sure sign everyone is well again. I am so thankful!

I’m not sure everyone else is glad to be back into full-time schoolwork again, but they’ve been doing well. It’s fun to catch them having fun while doing school.
Last Sunday we spent the day with Matt’s family. The kids were well-entertained (maybe a bit too much so) with ginormous lollipops from a friend’s wedding. After much licking, Elsie stuck out her tongue and said, Dad, look at my tongue! It’s a colorful one, isn’t it?

Tucked inside my week are always many excitements, unplanned occurrences, etc. One such event involved smelling smoke from upstairs. My internal Mommy smoke-detector went off and I ran downstairs to investigate. An unnamed culprit had burned some papers inside the recycling bin. Rightly scared, they took it outside to extinguish it better without further smokeage. Fortunately no harm was done. Unfortunately for them, Mom’s nose never lies.

We have hit the “When-it-gets-quiet-you’d-better-go-check” stage again. This time it is with little Betty. Powder all over her room. Markers all over her body. Oats all over the floor. Scissors in hand. It’s all or nothing, baby. She wears her little pink flip flops backwards. She works hard in the garden. In addition to the messes and disasters throughout each day, another thing is for certain: at night, all is at rest, they are still, and we relish the gift of sleep. The only thing they’re chasing are their dreams.

The roller skates have come out in full force along with the crocuses and tulips.

It’s hard to believe this little guy will be seven years old in three days!

Sometimes when the snot is running, the tempers are ranting, the fridge is emptying, and the feet are stomping, I forget to breath. Yet when those little arms squeeze my neck and those eyes look up at me with a grin, the snot and mess fades away. In the really challenging moments, they need love. Sometimes love is jumping on the trampoline until your hair stands on end. Sometimes it looks like pancakes made from scratch. Sometimes it means lying next to them way past their bedtime and reading one more book. Sometimes it’s a sticky lollipop… a really big colorful one.

The Dog Days Are Over

April 6, 2013April 6, 2013 / amylynw / Leave a comment

Too bad those days are over, Jack remarked to me, after remembering how Betty used to crawl.One thing is for certain: it is not too bad the sick days are coming to a close. This week, all I felt like I did was put straws of liquid into my children’s mouths and wash soiled laundry. But that meant no one died of dehydration (which happens every day around the world) and no one had to sleep in their own waste (which also happens every day around the world). What a privilege to give my children that gift.

Some of the first ones to get well.

Now, unfortunately, Matthew is plagued by the B-U-G and has had seventeen hours of sleep today so far.

Even though I experienced only 5 days of quarantine, I got a real taste of separation. Away from society, fun, and spontaneity, I felt really cut off from life.

It reminded me of a story. Every day, we sing a little song with Betty called “Ten Men”. It tells the story of ten lepers whom Jesus healed. They all got excited, and they all ran away! [we dance our hands around and then hide them behind our back] Except for one man… [we hold up our pointer finger] HE came back and said, “Thank you, thank you, Jesus.” I felt a teeny tiny bit like those lepers may have felt. Blocked from society, unclean, everyone keeping their distance. It’s rough! I can’t imagine what it must have been like for years and years to be in such isolated loneliness.

It’s so interesting that Jesus heals all ten, even though only one was grateful to Him about it. I would guess they felt grateful, but they didn’t glorify God or even thank Him for healing them. We’re like that a lot. The percentage of things we thank God for probably equals the ten percent of lepers that thanked Him for their healing. Every day He does miracles and wonders without any thanks from us to Him.

We might not suffer from leprosy of the skin, but we all suffer from what God calls leprosy of the heart. Another word for it is sin. It’s incurable without His touch. It separates us from God’s love, God’s forgiveness, and His abundant life. It’s lonely business being sick. Yet we’re fooled into thinking that the loneliness we feel deep inside our gut is a lack of something we can do to fill. A lie is whispered into every heart that beats: This [fill in the blank] will satisfy your loneliness. But we don’t realize the very One we’re separated from, is the One for whom we’re longing. We’re bombarded with noise and temporary satisfaction every single day. It’s so loud, we can’t hear the feet of Jesus walking past us, waiting for us to cry out to Him. See, He made Himself available to those men… He came and preached peace to you who were far off. They were distant, knew their condition, and cried out for mercy. But now in Christ Jesus, you who once were far away have been brought near by the blood of Christ.

It wasn’t anything they did. For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— not by works, so that no one can boast. When the one leper turned around, he fell on his face before Jesus and thanked Him.

That’s all it takes to go from being a leper to being whole. From loneliness to complete satisfaction. From sinner to saint. From eternal death to eternal life. One thing is for certain: when we finally see Jesus face to face, we will never say about our time here on earth: Too bad those days are over.

[Bible excerpts are found in Ephesians chapter 2]

Four Days in Ward 408

April 4, 2013April 4, 2013 / amylynw / 1 Comment

The fact that I’ve warmed up my tea six times in the past four hours is not a good sign. Neither are the blankets, pillows and bowls scattered over the living room floor. Since Monday at 1AM we’ve had three to five kids sick: blazing both ends, fevers and weakness. Right now the count is at five. I’ve never experienced this in my ten years of mommy-hood. Usually one or two at a time, but never all at once and in such an acute, long drawn out fashion. I have been keeping it together pretty well. Until around 10:45, when I realized it is Thursday. Thursday over here means I better not forget to move the van to the other side of the street, or else our city gets an extra Andrew Jackson in their bank account. Ugh. When I ran outside and saw the unhappy yellow slip on my windshield, I burst into tears, sobbing into the steering wheel. Don’t they know I have sick kids and can’t think straight??!! I yelled. Nope. No, they don’t. But my wonderful Heavenly Father does.

He is right here.
But I am continually with you; you hold my right hand. Psalm 73:23

He loves them more than I do. If I was living when Jesus was on this earth, I would have been one of those parents who brought their babies to Him, hoping He would touch them. Luke 18:15-17

He is the Healer.
The Lord supports him on his sickbed; you completely heal him from his illness. Psalm 41:3

He is my strength when I can’t do it anymore.
Assure me with these words: “I am your deliverer!” Psalm 35:3
Don’t be afraid, for I am with you! Don’t be frightened, for I am your God! I strengthen you— yes, I help you— yes, I uphold you with my saving right hand! Isaiah 41:10

So, one step at a time, we get through this trial. There have been so many At Least moments this week. At least I can be home and am not sick and can take care of them. At least we have a working washing machine and beautiful sunny days to hang up wash on the clothes line. At least we have water. At least we are usually healthy! God IS good, even when circumstances are horrible. Just because we’re sick and tired doesn’t mean He took a vacation. Just because I feel worn out, doesn’t mean He is. He actually says that is when His strength is made perfect. Not when everything is hunky dory and the sun is shining. Nope. His strength is perfect when we’re at our weakest, darkest, most vulnerable points in life. That’s when His grace, strength, and glory really shine.

You know, this girl right here can’t handle another day in the hospital ward of my living room. But because I have to, I’m forced to abandon my own strength and say it’s ALL Christ and NONE of me. Hands full or hands empty. Whatever I have, wherever I am, I can make it through anything in the One who makes me who I am. Philippians 4:13

Time for a fresh cup of tea.

At Least

March 29, 2013March 29, 2013 / amylynw / 1 Comment

I recently read an article which mentioned how saying At Least, when you’re about to blow up about something, can really help keep perspective. See, keeping my cool doesn’t come naturally. When several things bombard me each day to test my resolve, it’s not easy to keep the decibels low and the attitude right. I’m finding at least has helped me tremendously not to dive-bomb into discouragement, anger and defeat.

Discovering my keys were locked in the van yesterday morning… again, I was upset. At least I didn’t have to be anywhere, and many things were accomplished by being home all day. In addition, someone else was able to find joy in helping me out of my predicament. At least I have policemen for my friends!

Then last night I was moving the plastic slide from one spot in the yard to another. The orange part came unattached and slammed down on my wrist. It is still throbbing. At least I can still move my arm. At least my body knows how to heal.

Betty and the boys have been hanging out almost all week together while the older girls have had some time with Grandma Weldon. Currently, they are practicing knife-throwing at a wooden target outside. It was one of those moments where I almost told them they couldn’t do it. Then I thought, at least they’re not playing video games and at least they’re outside and learning a skill. I love that the target they drew is the Alley Cat. The dreaded feline that poops in our garden and makes mommy mad. Don’t worry, they won’t really kill it, all you cat-lovers out there.

When I told them to get dressed, they reappeared from downstairs wearing the exact same clothes they wore yesterday. The outfits that were just stuffed into the laundry basket after their bath last night. When confronted with this information, I was answered in typical boyish fashion: But this is my favorite shirt! I thought, why not? What is the big deal, anyway? At least there are two less outfits I need to wash this week.

Earlier in the week, we enjoyed a trip to the Franklin Institute with cousin Brian. Betty stayed with Grandma Watt and we had a fabulous all-boys day, complete with Five Guys for the three guys.

Betty is growing into her two-year-old-self very comfortably. She’s learned how to utilize the faucet mechanism of her tear ducts and can turn them on and off quite quickly if she so desires. Along with her strength of will and determination to communicate, she is growing in other areas too. Going potty, getting herself dressed as much as she can, and sitting at the table more and more are just some of the ways she’s growing up. When she cleans up, she does it 100 percent. I will need this girl to keep me in line when I’m old and grey.

On the flip side, when she makes messes, she does so 100 percent. Take the tube of toothpaste all over the chair as one instance.

She loves to eat wockles… or waffles.

Elsie has been enjoying her pink robe. She falls asleep in the funniest positions. She is also full of the funniest things to say. Look mom! I can move my eyeballs! She told me the other day, while she raised her eyebrows up and down. Putting her hand over her heart, she told me, Mommy, my heart is beeping.

Nadine is either exactly as tall as me, or a little taller. She is good at taking her little sisters under her wing, though loves having her own space as well. She loves a good s’more. It is crazy to think how we’ve experienced a snowstorm, gardening, and roasting marshmallows, all in one week. Yes, s’mores was our supper that night.

As the clouds roll over the sun today, I’m reminded of a Friday no one thought was good, two-thousand years ago. Day turned into night as God the Father left Jesus to suffer alone. Our sin was too great for Him to see. Then, darkness, sorrow, death. Everything we experience without Jesus.

Then, the greatest AT LEAST in history. At least it wasn’t the end. God’s plan was finished, yes, but it was not the end. At least after Friday, there comes Resurrection Sunday! Jesus Rose From The Dead Day, as my brother-in-law has so fitly renamed it. It’s not about eggs or jelly beans or hollow chocolate bunnies. When Jesus rose from the dead, He did something no other god has done. Because He didn’t stay dead, He gives us real victory over sin, real freedom from what trips us up, and real life from death. At least it didn’t end on Friday. Praise God!

Hidden Treasure

March 20, 2013March 20, 2013 / amylynw / Leave a comment

Spring always surprises me, and I love to be surprised. As I cleaned out the garden beds yesterday, I saw this gorgeous crocus. I acted as if someone had jumped out at me from behind a tree and I hollered out loud. I knew they were out there somewhere, but when I spotted it, it still surprised me. I love to be surprised. Have I said that before?

It reminds me of one of my favorite Bible stories. Joseph’s story is chock full of surprises. The part of the story I’m thinking about came to mind because I read it this morning. Joseph’s brothers had left Egypt and their brother Simeon behind, to bring grain back to their families who were close to starving. When they stopped for the night to feed their donkeys, they found their money in the mouth of the opened sack. It says they trembled. This was not a good deal, this was more of a nightmare. Their lives were at the mercy of the harsh-speaking ruler, who was actually their brother! The story gets better. When they have to return to buy more grain, they take double what they owe, in addition to their youngest brother, Benjamin. Joseph intimidated them so badly and squeaked out every drop of family information he could get so he could see his little brother again. What must those ten brothers have been thinking as they took the long trek back to Egypt? What must Simeon have been thinking as he sat in jail for weeks on end, pondering his past crime of selling Joseph to a bunch of slave traders?

When they arrive at last and present themselves before Joseph, he throws a feast for them. Confused, they tell the man in charge of Joseph’s house about the money mix-up. This is my favorite part: Don’t be afraid. Your God and the God of your father has given you treasure in your sacks. A shock indeed. Not only were they off free and clear, the Egyptian handed glory over where glory was due: God Himself!

The brothers weren’t even close to being done being surprised. At the meal, Joseph had them sit in birth order. Benjamin was given five times as much as anyone else.

Then, when it was time to leave, Joseph ordered his steward to put an enormous amount of food in their sacks, plus their money. Again. He also told him to put his special silver cup into Benjamin’s sack. This led to a planned-out donkey chase as Joseph ordered his steward to catch his brothers and find his silver cup. Of course, it was found in Benjamin’s sack. Of course he was the one and only son they had promised their father would come home without a scratch. So, they loaded up their donkeys and all headed back to face the wrath of the strange emotional ruler who was generous yet harsh.

Then, the biggest surprise of all. Joseph orders every person out of his presence except his brothers and drops a bomb shell on them. Weeping, he tells them he is Joseph, their brother. The Bible says they were speechless and terrified. Can you imagine?

I’ve never been surprised quite like that. But so often we are surprised when God blesses us. He is often looked at as the One who takes away, and we forget all He gives. Sometimes we think of Him as harsh, when He is really just testing us to know what is in our hearts. We all have treasures in our sacks. Our musty, dirty messed up lives are brimming with what we need to live. In addition to that, there is treasure. Every day there is treasure. Not of the money kind, but of the eternal kind.

We must be open in order to receive. We must be empty in order to be filled. He has given us treasure in our sacks.

Tell those rich in this world’s wealth to quit being so full of themselves and so obsessed with money, which is here today and gone tomorrow. Tell them to go after God, who piles on all the riches we could ever manage—to do good, to be rich in helping others, to be extravagantly generous. If they do that, they’ll build a treasury that will last, gaining life that is truly life. And oh… guard the treasure you were given! Guard it with your life. Avoid the talk-show religion and the practiced confusion of the so-called experts. People caught up in a lot of talk can miss the whole point of faith. Overwhelming grace keep you! – 1 Timothy 6:18-20

This priceless treasure we hold, so to speak, in a common earthenware jar—to show that the splendid power of it belongs to God and not to us. We are handicapped on all sides, but we are never frustrated; we are puzzled, but never in despair. We are persecuted, but we never have to stand it alone: we may be knocked down but we are never knocked out! Every day we experience something of the death of the Lord Jesus, so that we may also know the power of the life of Jesus in these bodies of ours. Yes, we who are living are always being exposed to death for Jesus’ sake, so that the life of Jesus may be plainly seen in our mortal lives. We are always facing death, but this means that you know more and more of life. – 2 Corinthians 4:7-12

I Ate A Carrot Once

March 20, 2013March 20, 2013 / amylynw / 1 Comment

Well, I finally found the Happy in my Birthday banner. Our sweet Elsie Rose is five years old. She writes, she nibbles off parts of her ABC crackers to spell her name correctly, she is full of hilarity. Today while she and Betty were driving with my mom to Bible school, my mom pointed out that there was a lot of traffic and she could see a long line of cars behind them. After turning around, she asked my mom, Why are so many cars following us? Then tonight at dinner, we were discussing carrots. Elsie is not a fond eater of veggies, although we sneak them into her diet many tricky ways. While discussing carrots, mainly the one-foot-long carrot Jack was eating, Elsie put her chin in her hand and noted: I ate a carrot once. Just once. That was enough. Probably never again. We’ll see about that.

This week I was pretty sick. I’ve been hanging onto a cough for a few weeks and my kindly brother-in-law doctor gave my lungs a listen and put me on some meds. Tonight I feel the best I’ve felt for awhile, so praying I’m truly on the mend. I won’t put pictures on here of how the house looked at its worst. Let’s just say: Mom’s Can’t Get Sick! Highlights would be the erector-set flower Elijah made for me, Matt’s sister coming for a day to teach the kids Science, hand-holding, robe-sleeping children, creative minds, eclectic outfits, my mommy making me dinner, homemade Indian food with friends, flurries along with crocuses, a clean bathroom, hot tea with friends, and a taste of spring!

The older three kids even got to tour The Master’s Baker, owned by some awesome relatives of ours. It was such a treat!

March 20131

Well, my tea is cold, my rice-bag is warm, and my bed is calling. Good night.

Where Is The Happy?

March 12, 2013March 12, 2013 / amylynw / Leave a comment

Yesterday, as we celebrated Elsie’s 5th birthday, it marked the end of my birthday week. I actually thought her birthday was today. As she went to bed on Sunday night she told me in her sweet little voice, I’m not going to be grumpy anymore! When I asked why, she told me, Because the day after tomorrow is my birthday! I was pretty tired and took her word for it. Not until I woke up yesterday and saw some special birthday emails for her, did I realize that yes, indeed, it was her birthday. Please tell me something like that has happened to another mom out there. So, I scrounged in my secret trunk trying to find and hang up the Happy Birthday banner I made for such occasions. All I came up with was BIRTHDAY. Where is the HAPPY?! I kept asking myself. Before I go into more of her surprise (for me) birthday, let me back up a week and divulge all the fun that was had the past week.

It all started on my birthday, when the three older kids came with Matthew & I on a road trip to NJ. We drove 3 hours there and 3 hours back, with about 45 mins in NJ total. It was work-related, so nothing too exciting. The highlight was hitting the beach for fifteen minutes.

I had some wonderful friends over that night for tea and snacks and a whole lot of fun. The next day I was served breakfast in bed by my oldest. She loves to do this. The rest of the week was full of dentist appointments, Betty learning to put the car windows down with her bare little toes streeetching across her carseat, sweet sleeping children, lincoln log creations, school, tea, and much more.

Then came Friday. After dropping off the kids, Matthew and I spent the weekend away. What a wonderful time. Becoming disconnected happens so quickly! As it should be, we have both changed and grown, and sometimes we miss that happening and we look at the other as if they are a stranger we should know, but don’t. It was a treat and a blessing to have this time.

From the beautiful inns where we stayed, to the memories made, it was a weekend to remember!

The week was completed with an impromptu meeting with dear, old friends.

There’s the Happy.

My Perfect Normal

March 4, 2013March 4, 2013 / amylynw / 2 Comments

Tonight as I sit and sip my Bavarian Wild Berry hot tea, I am plunging into the memories of the past week. A wonderful weekend with my sisters and sister-friends. These girls knew me way back when… I never wore shoes, lived in mango trees, and seldom took a shower.

Can you tell which ones are blood-sisters, and which are sister-friends?

As I was thrown back into “normal”, I’m starting to swim again. Before, I was gulping for air, unsure of where to put my feet, and had forgotten how to tread water. Pennsylvania is vastly different from Haiti. There are some things I don’t think I’ll ever be able to fully put into words. My heart has a hallowed pondering ground, where thoughts between me and the Lord reside. I’ve been asking Him to give me the ability to come back and 100% accept and take on the responsibilities given to me today, here, and now. It’s not worth my breath to compare myself, my life, or my experiences with any other person. I am realizing how perfect my crazy, messy, full, busy, joyful, loud, spontaneous, and beautiful life is. It is just as it should be, and is custom-made for me by our Creative God.

This week was full of perfect examples. An empty box, full of clementine peels, stashed in the living room. Betty sitting on the kitchen floor, pink jammies covering her sweet piggies, reading out loud with a tiny pile of pretzels beside her. Being called into the living room, in the flurry hour of supper-making and evening rowdies, to see the amazing sight of all five kids on top of Matthew’s back. Are we heavy, Daddy? Schoolwork, flips on the trampoline, haircuts, beautiful shows by the sun while I’m driving, painted nails, a lost tooth, oats in the hair, on the face, on the floor, spills, fights, apologies, notes, special deliveries, and more punctuated my normal week.

March 2013

Today Elsie was crying about a sore tooth. After calling the dentist, I was able to come in right away. It turns out my mad scheduling skills forgot about her and Jack’s check-ups for over a year. Thankfully, found out there was nothing wrong with her teeth except super sensitivity, was able to schedule Jack for tomorrow, and earned a pair of silly glasses as a reward. Ironically, yet another child has an already-scheduled appointment the next day. I think that’s a record for us. Three kids, three days in a row to the dentist.

Since this happens to be my birthday week, so far the icing on the proverbial birthday cake was my Ikea date yesterday with Mom & Heidi. Mom brought mugs and teabags, I ordered chocolate cake and other yummies, and we sipped hot tea at the cafe, then enjoyed ourselves at Ikea for the afternoon! Tomorrow I will be three times the age I was when I was one year older than Nadine is now. Yep.

Bright Hope

February 22, 2013February 22, 2013 / amylynw / 1 Comment

I can’t shake the chill from my fingers. This is the umpteenth time I’ve warmed up my daughter’s heart-shaped rice bag and snuggled it close. Was it really a week ago that my legs were burning as I bushwhacked my way up a thorny hillside to behold a sight so beautiful it made every scratch worth it? DSC_6516-001 Was it really only a week ago we were on the beautiful Haitian shoreline, snorkeling in the ocean, and crisping under the Caribbean sun? I remember our last night there but it collides with my today so jarringly, I wonder if it really happened? Ocean breezes collide with winter chill. Adventure seems to have made way for monotony. New sights have been replaced by similar surroundings again. As clichéd as it is, last week feels like a dream.

My body is jet-lagged not from time, but weather. It’s impossible to write even a summary of our week in Haiti. I could go through my journal and tell you each thing we did or ate, but I don’t think that would be profitable. I’d rather reflect on the ways God worked in my heart and showed Himself to me. Before leaving, our entire family was plagued with the great throw-up bug. In between washing sheets and blankets and every conceivable surface, I attempted to pack. How it got done is only by God’s grace. I had pictured myself cleaning our house and leaving it pristine and tidy, with love notes tucked in different places for Matt to find while we were gone. I left the house a complete mess. Not one single love note, not even scribbled on the mirror.

One of my worst fears was getting sick while we were in Haiti. The second our plane landed, Nadine threw up. The day after we arrived, I was hit with terrible diarrhea. I prayed for God to take it away and He did, just before we left on our first outing into the village. The next night I was hit with a fever and went to bed shivering and sweating all night long. The next day we traveled to the Moringa field where CPR-3 is working. I was not about to let a fever get in the way of the day. The moringa tree is literally a miracle from God. Check out the amazing benefits it provides, here. Revelation 2:22 paints a little picture of Heaven and describes another miraculous tree: And the leaves of the tree are for the healing of the nations. This verse implanted itself on my mind the entire day we chopped down moringa trees. I ate their leaves and prayed for healing from the fever. The whole day was a blessing. We sweated and learned more about each other, and eventually I did get well.

DSC_5546-001

God took my worst fear and showed me that His grace is sufficient in our weakness. I felt His care through my team around us, encouraging and caring for Nadine & me. There are many fears that throw themselves at us each and every day. This week I was reminded: you are still here, because God wants you here. Not that I feel as if I was facing death, but many are, and we never know what tomorrow may bring. If we rest in God’s promise of now, and do not fear what we can not see, our hearts can be at peace. Haiti Day 6

That is enough to jump for joy and be full of hope.

Strength for today, bright hope for tomorrow;
Blessings all mine, with ten thousand besides.

I Heart Haiti

February 15, 2013February 15, 2013 / amylynw / 6 Comments

Nadine & I arrived home early this morning. Our trip was amazing. It was so special to be together! Many people thought we were sisters, which I took as an extremely high compliment! Our team was the best! What a blessing to grow together and see God at work in so many ways. It is going to take me quite awhile to process everything into words. So for now I will just talk through some pictures. The stories will flow when they’re ready.