Saying Goodbye to Try

The other day Betty said to me, “I want to do something I’ve NEVER done before!”  I literally blinked my eyes and stared at her in wonder.  Not for the first time, either.  This girl seems to say things which I feel like have come from somewhere deep inside my own heart.  Unspoken.  Then they find words  and come out of her mouth.  “Really?”  I answered, playing with her hair.  She’s been on big rollercoasters and flown inside a cessna airplane.  I could tell in her eyes she had a hunger to experience the thrill of something new.  Just like her mama.  So, even though she’s done it before, it had been a long, long time.  We decided to take a walk around the neighborhood and she asked to bring her bike.  It’s been about a year since she rode it, and she was nervous about falling down.  My favorite thing about our time together, wasn’t the fact that she did in fact ride the bike without me holding on.  No, my favorite thing was how she talked to herself while she rode.  “I can do this!  I can do this!  I can do this!” she breathed over and over while I slowly let go and ran beside her.  Cheering her on.  Watching her fly alone.  In her hounds-tooth dress and polka dot rain boots.  Her fear lay in a pothole somewhere between our house and 8th Ave.IMG_8061There’s something incredible about what we say to ourselves.  I dare you to listen to yourself when you’re thinking.  It’s incredibly enlightening.  Do you say things to yourself that you would never allow someone to say to your child?  Or to you?  Changing negative thinking has totally transformed my life and is transforming the lives of our children.

Interestingly, Paul didn’t say, “I think I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.”  Nope.  We should never say we will try to do this or that.  Every time we try, we make a small exception for ourselves to fail.  And you know what?  You might mess up and fail.  But that should never keep us from picking ourselves back up and getting stronger.  I CAN do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

I am so proud of these kiddos.  We completed our school year a couple weeks ago.  They have all grown and accomplished so much!  2016-05-06 14.08.57
Being out of school has been just what we all needed.  There has been a lot of imagination and rearranging and purging that comes when Mommy’s brain is free from thinking of school for a couple of weeks.  We started our vacation out right with a broken arm.  Broken in three places, no less.  That girl is incredibly tough. This is the second time this has happened in her short little life.    She doesn’t complain, and she really hasn’t let it stop her from doing anything.  When I told her to be careful on the playground, Betty piped up: “At least I can jump!  Because I have two arms and two thumbs and two elbows!”

New neighbors just moved in next door, and the boys had no qualms about asking them if they could have a bunch of their huge furniture boxes to make a small town with them.  The rest of the day was spent cutting and creating tiny houses.

Earlier this week, Elsie let out a big sigh in front of me and said,”I just want to run a business or something!”  She kept persisting, and finally her dream became a reality.  Older sister and a friend all chipped in to squeeze lemons and taste test the perfect lemonade.  We had some very enthusiastic salesmen and women, who were not afraid to ask the UPS man, the neighbors, and any passersby’s to buy a cup of refreshing lemonade.  Why?  Elsie, broken arm and all, determined it was to raise money for gymnastics.  This has been a huge dream of hers, and I’m so proud of her for looking ahead, past the “impossible” and seeing her arm healed enough to take gymnastics. IMG_8156
Many days are spent gardening and cutting fresh flowers, enjoying delicious berries, and being amazed at how my belly has popped out with pride and joy.  At 17 weeks, baby Chip is kicking and loving the berries I’m eating.  Most recently, Matthew put up a new fence on the one side of our yard.  It was an exhausting day.  But one of my favorite kinds of tired.

So very thankful and daily more in love with this guy.  He takes good care of us.  He feels great, which is something we never ever take for granted.  Once your health has been on the edge of survival wondering at the surety  of your next breath, you never go a day without praising God for one more day to enjoy this thing called life.  Every day my passion grows to help others who are hurting and sick and tired of being sick and tired.

For the next coupe of days I need to get my game on and face my least favorite past-time: packing.  The motivation of having five whole days with Matthew by my side, along with some of the most motivating, loving, encouraging people… I’m not going to TRY.  I will take a lesson from my sweet Betty and whisper: “I can do this.  I can do this.”  I can confidently face my suitcase and smile.

 

The Best Chocolate Chip

The sound never grows old.  A faint, steady rhythm.  So tiny, yet so strong.  We call him “Chip”, because at one point, baby was the size of a chocolate chip. The name stuck.  Now Chip is bigger, and his heart is definitely beating.  Life.  Hidden and mysterious, but unmistakably there.  On Monday I had my first midwife appointment and got to meet Chip in a super special way, as the tears pooled in my eyes and his heartbeat met my ears.  Every morning for the past couple of weeks I’ve sighed a great hallelujah that my pants still button.  But thirteen weeks into this journey, and it’s time to expand my wardrobe for my expanding wasitline!  I’m definitely tired of sweat pants and feeling frumpy.
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The second highlight of our week was Tuesday.  Hearing a solid “well done” from the kids’ evaluator, marked another year in the books for the Weldon Academy of Natural Studies.  We now officially have one 1st grader, one 3rd grader, one 5th grader and two 8th graders.  Good thing I’m sitting down right now.  It’s been a huge year, full of much learning and growing.  We celebrated with lunch at the Green Street Grille.  What a HUGE accomplishment!  They’re growing up so fast.  In fact, the other day Jack asked Betty how old she wants to be when she grows up.  She thought for a moment and said, “Seventeen.”2016-05-10 13.20.18-1Last month, I had the incredible privilege of flying out to Portland to visit my dear friend, April.  We grew up together for a few years in the middle of Africa.  Her house was just a shout away.  In fact, we would often stand at the bottom of their hill and yell, “Do you have a roll of toilet paper we could borrow?!”  Or “Do you have butter?!”  You know, the essential things.  This is probably one huge reason I love my neighbor, Jen, so much.  I don’t think a week goes by without borrowing something from her… and it is often ONE egg, or TWO INCHES of butter, please.  Having someone who loves you and doesn’t think any less of you because you fail to figure out just how many eggs you’ll need each week… on a weekly basis… is pretty grand.

April and I have been friends for almost thirty years.  I don’t even FEEL like I’m 30 yet, so this is pretty wild for me to comprehend even still.  But we have, because Math doesn’t lie, or something like that.  She is one of the most genuine people I know.  I love her courage and gusto in life.  I love that she doesn’t let fear hold her down from following God’s leading.  That leading happens to be into the middle of the jungle of Papua, Indonesia.  I am so thankful I got to squeeze her and even run a mini “Amazing Race Portland” with her and a friend before she flew back across a HUGE ocean to her home.  As we prayed before she dropped me off at the airport, I was absolutely floored by the goodness and grace of God to weave and keep tight the bond of this friendship which has spanned more time and miles than I can comprehend.

As things grow and change in our family, this guy remains constant and steady.  2016-04-08 07.10.53-1We have had such fun dreaming together.  He is such an encouragement to me every day.  I don’t often feel what he sees, but I choose to believe him, because he’s never lied to me yet.  We are so excited to see how the Lord is going to work out the details of our future.  We sense His stirring in our lives and know He has something amazing in store.

Baby Chip is proof of that.

Like Arrows

Sometimes when I look around our table, it feels like someone is missing.  Then, a few weeks ago my heart skipped a beat.  Two blue lines.  DSC_1277
It would be an understatement to say the big kids are excited to have another baby in the house.  DSC_1312
Despite the look on Matthew’s face here, he is truly excited.  I’m thrilled beyond words, which is why it’s taken me precisely two hours to even write the last two sentences.  We know this blessing is from our Father above, Who is aware of every detail of our lives.  We know He will show His faithfulness and provision in new and exciting ways this year.  Elijah is especially thrilled to have another buddy to keep him company in his birthday month of November.  DSC_1302
Rejoice with us!

Children are a heritage from the Lord,
    offspring a reward from him.
 Like arrows in the hands of a warrior
    are children born in one’s youth.
 Blessed is the man
    whose quiver is full of them.

Psalm 127:3-5

All of a Sudden

So before another month flies by, I’d really like to share a bit about the time I went flying to Tennessee last month!  It was an unexpected gift, yet one I worked hard to earn.  As my Plexus business grows, I too have been growing.  Stretching my wings a bit, both figuratively and literally.  Matthew is an incredible support and is always encouraging me to keep going, keep learning, keep growing.  So, I was gifted this trip by one of the leaders on my team, to go to a John Maxwell mindset training event given by Sonya Dudley, who is also someone whom I look up to in life and business.  There were four of us total from our team, and we had SUCH a great time together.  All mamas, sharing a passion for Jesus and health and freedom.  It was one of the most inspiring weekends I’ve had in a really long time.  I came home with copious notes.

Mindset really does matter.  “Whether you think you can or you can’t, either way you’re right.”  I realized a lot of lies I’ve let myself believe.  Things about my past which I’ve allowed to define who I am today.  They have played a part in shaping me into who God has made me to be, but they do not define me.  Jesus Christ has set me free from fear of man, shame from bad choices I’ve made, and doubt of what He is capable of doing through me.  Absolutely no one on this earth can do what you have been placed on this globe at this time to do.  No one.

This is my passion: to bring the same hope to others.  I never ever thought a pink drink would pave the way to talk to so many people about hope in Christ and hope in health.
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It’s rather ironic how flat out on our couches we have been for the past month with coughs and tummy bugs.  I would be the last person to claim Plexus as a cure or preventative for anything.  Of course we still get sick… but when we are well… we are thriving!  I can’t tell you just how much stronger I feel than ten months ago.  None of this happened all of a sudden.  It’s been a consistent and gradual change.  My hair is finally growing thicker.  My nails are crazy strong and healthy without ridges and bumps.  I have been the exact same weight for at least 6 months, without fluctuating those 5-10 pounds once a month.  Mood swings are incredibly rare.  I wake up feeling refreshed after sleeping like a log all night.  I am a much more calm and collected mom than I have ever been, thanks to the simple fact that my blood sugar is finally balanced.  It is so simple yet has made such a profound impact on my life as a wife, mom, teacher, and now businesswoman.  This is such a tiny smattering of the blessing Plexus has been in our life.  Just one story of thousands.

So everything inside of me went for a little loop last week when I stumbled through a few days clouded with an old and very unwelcome friend: depression.  I knew what was true, and the thoughts which were tempting me to despair were nothing short of lies.  They shrouded my mind into thinking there is nothing really out there for me.  Like a fog which tricks the eye into certainty of no more than nothingness ahead.  Yet praise God for His Word which is sharper than any two edged sword, and most certainly is able to penetrate light onto my foggy path. He brought me out to the other side and has shown me some incredible promises.  There are some beautiful verses which encourage me that I am not the first one to feel these feelings or think these thoughts.  Neither are you.  It’s what we do with these thoughts that matter.  Only by the power of God’s Word, can you dispel the fiery darts of the enemy.  Psalm 27 is one of my favorite passages.  The last two verses say:

I would have lost heart, unless I had believed
That I would see the goodness of the Lord
In the land of the living.

Wait on the Lord;
Be of good courage,
And He shall strengthen your heart;
Wait, I say, on the Lord!

Lots of exciting things are in store for us this year.  Some huge decisions, and I know that is part of why I felt like shutting down was a good idea.  I love what Matthew reminded me of the other day when I was at my lowest. There are so many pivotal moments recorded in the Bible.  Important stories and dialogues and days, but the in-between days, weeks, months, years… are not all recorded.  Yet always, always, always, God shows up in the mundane.  Solomon, searching for some lost donkeys all of a sudden is anointed king.  Joseph, doing what was before him to do each day in prison all of a sudden was next in command to Pharaoh. Moses, a shepherd, all of a sudden was chosen to be the deliverer of an entire nation.  Jesus, a local carpenter, all of a sudden doing miracles and signs and wonders.  It even seems babies are conceived and all of a sudden birthed in one verse, leaving out the long nine months of waiting and the arduous labor and delivery.  Every single “all of a sudden” moment in the Bible or in your life and mine, has been preceded by many ordinary and unsung days.  Tucked between the ordinary and extraordinary is usually a series of painful and difficult moments, days, months or years.

In the mundane, quitting is not an option.  Trust is vital.  Each moment is but a small stroke in the entire masterpiece.  One day we get to stand back and see how it all fits together.

There Is No Way on Earth Those Pants Are My Size (and other snippets of my day)

There’s a bowl of pretty-well-licked-out melted chocolate chips next to me.  I’m on my third cup of hot tea for the evening (decaf of course) and my head has a slight ache (chocolate helps that, right?).  It’s been one of THOSE days.  It began well.  Very well, in fact.  I came downstairs to find the children playing school.  I mean, we homeschool, so I thought the possibility of PLAYING school was out of the realm of possibility.  It helps that as of yesterday evening, after finishing our first term of school without one, we finally have an actual school table.

We had a blast at IKEA yesterday, picking out our school table!

We had a blast at IKEA yesterday, picking out our school table!

A new table apparently makes doing school super exciting.  I even overheard the teacher telling her students: “That test is going to be very severely graded!”  It was all fun and games, but then I turned my body and saw a huge pile of STUFF in the corner.  Something went off in my head, and picking EVERYTHING UP OFF THE FLOOR THAT ISN’T FURNITURE became top priority.  (That is my favorite thing to say, by the way.)  I may have gone a bit crazy.  End result: full trashcan, clean floor, settled mama.

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Somehow in there, the clock decided to jump ahead a few hours to it being the time we were supposed to be headed out the door for Elijah’s guitar lesson.  Thankfully, his teacher is super flexible, and we were able to scoot out the door a couple hours later.  Meanwhile, because time likes to be ornery, I couldn’t figure out why everyone was yelling and crying and not getting their math problems… until I actually looked at the clock and saw it was way past noon.  Everything stopped.  Eggs were cracked into frying pans.  Sriracha sauce was uncapped.  Avocados were cut.  Bread was toasted.  Bellies were filled.  Math made sense again.

I do love how every day is different.  Though there are some things that happen almost every day.  Like, a cup of hot tea in the morning.  And Nadine cleaning up the kitchen every night.  She has become quite proficient at it.  I encourage all you mamas of pre-teens… get them started!  Nadine has been hard at work doing this job for over a year, but has it down to a perfected science.  I am usually at my most exhausted, and she somehow almost always gets a second wind around 9:00.  Win, win!  I found that she does a much better job when I leave the room and don’t micromanage how she does it… because, surprise of all surprises… we have VERY different approaches when it comes to how we get it clean.  The end result is pretty much the same, however.  Thank you, darling!  (She can read this… because she’s a teenager now and subscribes to her mama’s blog… I am BEYOND touched and love her so much!)

In the midst of the chaos that was today, I did chisel out thirty minutes of quiet, alone time with the Maker of the Universe.  How’s that for a date?  I think sometimes I only see Him as that and get all nervous to lay my requests before Him and wait in expectation.  So, today I did just that.  The peace which overwhelmed my soul was indescribable.  Before, the sky was cloudy and cold.  After, the clouds were stunning with glimpses of sunshine pouring out like beams of pure gold.  He has a way of reminding me of how close He really is, even though my heart strives constantly to do and go and accomplish.  He says to just be.

A few other chaotic things happened today after that peace, but isn’t that life on this side of Heaven?  One of them was disagreeing strongly with the man at Goodwill that the pants I was buying for Elsie were in fact for a child and not for an adult as he was ringing them up to be.  I even took them from his hand, held them up to my body and told him that there was no way on earth I would ever fit in these pants which clearly fit on my daughter… and I held them up to her.  He didn’t budge.  My blood was boiling inside because it was very clear who was right and who wasn’t.  There was a long line and so I chose… peace.  I mean, I wasn’t really upset that I was getting them for $2 instead of $1;  I was just upset because I was right and he was wrong.  Yeah.  That’s super.  Anyway, I didn’t blow up and I even made out with an amazing $2 necklace… which goes great with my plaid, don’t you think?
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By the time we arrived home, supper was zero percent away from being started, I was hangry, and it was 5:30 and dark outside.  I threw ROCK HARD FROZEN chicken into a pan with salt, pepper, and lemon juice and miraculously didn’t burn it.  Matthew always can tell when I don’t cook with a little bit of love poured into the food.  I think it’s because my dear friend, with her beautiful smile and loving self, walked into my kitchen at that exact moment and the love started seeping out my pores and into the pan of chicken.  It didn’t burn, and tasted amazingly delicious all chopped up in our salad.  The evening was spent with my friend, dreaming and building our business together.

Now my third cup of tea is cold.  Time is playing tricks on me again, because it keeps telling me hours have passed since I last looked at the clock.  My children keep getting taller and making food non-existent in our refrigerator and cupboards.  Betty said the funniest thing the other day.  I have no idea what was going on, but she told me: I have a feeling of myself.
Really?  What do you feel?

Like Jack and Elsie are going to find a real mouse.  I have a bad feeling.

Then, the other day Elsie and Betty were playing house, complete with pretend money, and I overheard this very upset showdown between mother and daughter:
You  bought a dog?! You just wasted all our money!– Elsie
But she gave me a change! said Betty cheerfully.
It’s still not enough! -Elsie

Now my fourth cup of tea is hot, because my intuitive husband just came and gave me a refill.  I’m excited to snuggle up with him tonight.  I’m so thankful I am his and he is mine.  Elsie just came and asked if she can listen to jazz music to fall asleep.  Every day is so full of moments of gratefulness and awe.  I’m so thankful for many things, but mostly I’m thankful for God’s grace, and that my life is not a test to be severely graded, because it would be an utter failure!

Tapestry of Fall & Family

I was walking in between them, my arms interwoven with theirs, strong and beautiful, like a perfect piece of tapestry.  We laughed as the leaves fell around us, and I looked at them both and said, “I remember pushing you two in a double baby stroller!”  And here we are now, leaning on eachother, laughing at jokes everyone understands, and these babies are growing up faster than I can catch my breath.  We’ve always been held together by love, but now it’s not just me giving all of my strength to keeping them alive and nourished.  Now they are also supporting me with their love and wisdom and bodily presence.  I don’t want them to stop growing up, because I love each stage they’re experiencing.  Yet I want it to freeze sometimes, like a perfect ray of sunshine which captures a moment before winking at you and disappearing forever.  Time keeps winking at me.  Having the last say.  Making these babies taller than me, stronger than me.  Their hearts aren’t so grown up yet, and I relish their simplicity of thought.  I am humbled by their generous thinking well of everyone.  I love this time of shaping and molding and letting them sprout their wings a bit more and dream big dreams.

This girl.  She is so becoming and growing responsible.  This month she turned thirteen.  How is it possible?  A couple of weeks ago we couldn’t use water inside our house, and she washed all of the dishes with boiled water in a big bowl outside on the patio.  She’s a hard worker and loves challenges.  She always has room in her heart for one more person to love and makes them feel as if they’re the most important person in the world.  She is stronger than impenetrable circles, also known as cliques, because she has the courage to talk to the ones on the outside of them.  Things are not important to her.  Only hearts.
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This young man.  He is different these days.  Thinking deeper thoughts and dreaming bigger dreams.  If you are a close friend, then he has probably cried for you as he lifts you in prayer, because his heart is softer than any boy I’ve ever known.  He has been working so hard lately to be stronger in some areas.  Elijah also has the gift of music and making taste-buds sing.  He’s turning into quite the chef, and has made some pretty mouth-watering meals for us recently!  He made up a song for Nadine’s birthday, and had us roaring with laughter as he made up a verse for everyone in our family.
October 2015 phone photos1
Then there’s this other young man.  He gets through his schoolwork so he can hammer more nails to his fort, or create some inventory for his newest business venture.  On Saturday, he forgot to eat lunch because he was so intent on getting his business underway: selling homemade wooden toys!  Matthew was able to take him to work one day this week, which made our house a lot quieter.  The best part of the day, though, was when he came home, and everyone ran out to Matt’s truck to welcome him home, and swap stories around the dinner table.  Jack has a pretty dry sense of humor that is starting to develop more as he matures.  He isn’t afraid of throwing a dance party in our front yard, choreographed to whatever music is playing in someone’s car going down the street.
October 2015 phone photos
Number four is as industrious as a worker bee, making our world much sweeter with all of her buzzing.  She loves to read and dance and do cartwheels.  She often prances around and says, “I’m SO happy!”  She loves life with every ounce of her being.  Whenever she receives good news larger than her heart can bear, she starts to cry and laugh all at the same time.  She is such a sweet big sister to Betty, and the two stick together like glue.  The other day, I had the ironing board out in our room.  Not one, but two of our children came in with wonder and curiosity on their faces.  Elsie stared wide-eyed and gasped, “What IS that thingy?”  I guess it doesn’t see the light of day much.
October 2015 phone photos4
Our sweet number five keeps us smiling and laughing all day long.  The other morning she walked into our room and woke me up by saying, “Mommy?”  Once I answered her she said, “I think I’m going back to bed now.” And tiptoed back to bed.  I lay with sleepy-dust and laughter both tickling my eyes.  When we were at the farm, feeding the animals, she exclaimed about the pigs: “They’re STARVING!” and gleefully gave the famished pigs more food.  She loves to help.  In the kitchen, around the house, if someone is sick or hurt.  She adores school and wants to “read” everything and paint every day.
October 2015 phone photos3
This past week was spent recuperating from a long weekend away last week.  What a blessing to have earned a trip to Washington DC with the company I work for, and have so many amazing memories tucked away from our time there.  Hanging out with good friends, meeting new friends, a concert by Jewel, being inspired by the humorous Rita Davenport, delicious food, and quality time with Matthew.

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Yesterday, we experienced Wyebrook Farm for the first time.  What a gorgeous fall day to be together and be spoiled by stunning scenery and delicious food!
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This guy.  He is so incredibly hard-working without complaint.  I love dreaming big with him by my side.
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Happy fall, from our family to you!
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We Waited A Decade For This Moment

Today held one of those moments in life which freeze a forever picture onto your mind’s eye.  Matthew had a follow-up doctor’s appointment with a couple of his ENT specialists down at Jefferson.  All the kids came along, and we maneuvered the parking garage, elevators, city blocks and waiting room chairs.  The first doctor took a look down his throat, through his nose.  I have been to every appointment where he has been scoped, and have seen enough inflammation to know the moment the picture came on the screen, that this was “normal”.  I videoed the procedure and now have something with which to compare it.  These are screen shots of a cell phone video… but if you have any sort of medical background you’ll probably be able to see the difference between the two:

Matthew's vocal chords, 2014 and 2015.

Matthew’s vocal chords, 2014 and 2015.

His first doctor said, “What are you doing?”  Matthew told him he’s been keeping a pretty strict diet, exercising, plus added some supplements which have been really helping.  “Well, whatever you’re doing, keep doing!” were his instructions.  He said he had never seen his throat and nose look that good.  In his words: “I see no evidence of disease at all. There is no inflammation.”  He was so pleased.  The second doctor was even more flabbergasted. Especially when he learned Matthew is no longer on any prescription meds.  “There is no crusting in your sinuses whatsoever.  Not even a bit.  It looks completely clean as a whistle.  What are you doing differently?” he asked.  So Matthew told him about Plexus and how we’ve been taking supplements which target gut health, inflammation and balancing blood sugar.  He was super interested and wanted to know a bit more about it.  Then he said, “Keep doing what you’re doing!” and asked for more information.  This journey of a decade has seen us sitting in MANY waiting room chairs.  More doctor dates than I can count.  I am so thankful for the many people who have prayed and supported us through this journey.  It feels like the end of a really difficult race, yet I know it’s actually the beginning of a new lap in life.   One of the hardest turns was two years ago.  These verses spoke into the darkness which threatened to swallow us in that hospital room: 
We were under great pressure, far beyond our ability to endure, so that we despaired of life itself.  Indeed, we felt we had received the sentence of death. But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead.  He has delivered us from such a deadly peril, and He will deliver us again. On Him we have set our hope that He will continue to deliver us,  as you help us by your prayers. Then many will give thanks on our behalf for the gracious favor granted us in answer to the prayers of many. (2 Corinthians 1)
Today I feel like the last part of those verses has come to a sort of fruition.  We know there has been much glory and praise given to our GREAT God and deliverer today.  Because of what He has done through our circumstances, we are unable to keep our mouths shut.  

I want to take it a step further here.  We feel like nothing which has happened to us has been for nothing.  If our story helps one person, it has been worth it.  Yet, we don’t want to just be an encouraging story you read.  We want our story to stir you into action.  Yeah, it’s not easy to change your lifestyle, eat a whole new way and exercise when it’s almost never convenient.  And if I used strong language I would insert it here.  It also SURE ISN’T EASY to sit in a hospital and wonder if your life will be taken away or spared.  That changes you.  It changed us to action, research, questioning everything, and trying new things.  Our story is not over, but it’s been an incredible page-turner so far.  Everyone’s health journey is SO personal and intimate to them.  But if I could look you straight in the eye and beg you not to wait until it’s too late to get a hold of your health, I would.

We’ve been trudging through a pile of puzzle pieces for so long, and both feel that Plexus has been that last missing piece, bringing everything together.  Because his gut is healing, other things are happening.  In four months, Matthew feels better than he ever has on any prescription meds.  The amount of reading and research I’ve done has solidified my belief.  Now to have two elite specialists giving us their thumbs up: incredible.  2015-09-26 11.59.53

I love this picture of Betty and him counting to 100 while they waited for the doctor to come.  I get choked up in humble thanksgiving that our children are blessed with such an amazing dad.  His faith, endurance, and gentleness stand out to me the most.
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Thank you for praising with us together tonight!

September Snapshots

This week in school has been busy!  We made gliders in Science class one day to learn about drag and experiment with a long skinny wing vs a short and wide wing… which flies further?  It’s always fun when school can be brought outside.
September 2015
Our sidewalk always needs a sweep, and we have a few kids who adore sweeping.  I love her joy and I also love her outfit… which has been going strong for three days now.  I think it’s one of her favorites too!  DSC_7828-2
I’m thankful for homeschooling, but by three o’clock my brain is toast and I need a few minutes of alone time.  The other day Betty, who’s middle name is shadow, said, “I really want to follow you because I have a lot of stuff to say to you!”  I mean, really.  How do you not squeeze someone like that?  She’s also very perceptive of when I need a break.  A couple days ago, she happened to be walking up the stairs behind me as I retreated to my room for a few minutes of silence.  She immediately said, “I’m not following you, mom.”  I laughed on the inside, and her wit started the process of melting away the stress of that day.  She is loving Kindergarten.  She constantly wants to do more and learn more.
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Elijah continues to invent, experiment and build.  He got over his fear and mastered a front flip off the diving board this summer.  He almost made me dive headfirst into our grill while I was flipping hamburgers the other night, when he snuck up behind me and scared the living daylights out of me!  He’s a great big brother.  He loves music and his guitar lesson is the highlight of his week.
Captured Videos
Nadine is doing great in school.  She loves her time with her rabbits.  Yes, Oreo is really jumping into the air.  He races around our front porch and Nadine says he’s happy when he does that.  I don’t speak bunny, but she does.  She occasionally babysits now, which she enjoys very much!  She is super into coloring to de-stress, and continues to be the best letter-writer in the County!
September 2015 phone photos1
Jack keeps improving on his reading.  He is strong and a perfectionist.  He enjoys competing with Matthew and one day he will beat him, I’m sure!  He totally beats me in pull-ups, push-ups and the like.  He loves to play with coins and carry them around in a sock.
September 2015 phone photos2
Elsie is a great big sister.  She and Betty still enjoy twinning some days.  She is very much into gymnastics, even though not officially taking lessons. She watched some YouTube videos and learned how to do a back bend, and how to do a back pullover on the bars!  She has turned into a bookworm, and I love that her favorite book right now was one of my favorite books when I was her age: Annie Oakley!  She constantly is tidying up around the house, and more than a few times I have come upstairs at the end of the day to find the bathroom scrubbed, or my bed made.  She is a strong girl with a lot of determination!
September 2015 phone photos3
In a few weeks Matthew & I will be running the Ragnar relay again.  So I’ve been running a lot.  Since we started taking Plexus and my blood sugar has been stabilizing, I actually sweat now.  I never used to sweat, and so this is a new phenomenon for me and I text way too many pictures of my sweaty face to Matthew because it tickles me… literally!  When I’m not running or teaching school, I’m IN school or in our kitchen.  Things I study: I’m still studying to become a certified aromatherapist, which I love and dive into when there’s a free evening.   Also, constantly researching gut health.  My favorite beverage is a tumeric latte, which helps with inflammation.  It’s a sad evening when the whole thing spills all over the table and dyes the floor yellow.  It’s amazing stuff.
September 2015 phone photos4
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Time with Matthew is incredibly precious.  The other night we were able to slip away for a little date.  I pulled out some shoes I haven’t worn since I was a teenager.  Fun times!
In closing, I’ll attach a video we made yesterday.  In science we decided to conduct a little experiment about a product in our house we generally think is “healthy”.  But is it?  Check it out to see our amateur video attempts.  This was our first run through, and the kids thought the humor was fun so here it is.  First cut.  Enjoy!

Running and Free

We were created to be free.  One of my favorite things about being a child of God is the freedom we have in Christ.  Why has Christ set us free from sin and death?  For the incredible and awesome status of “free”.  Free to love beyond ourselves.  Free to truly live and not just exist.  We were on those slave blocks.  Half-naked, humiliated, alone.  Sin had us bought and mocked and tortured some more.  Deep inside all of us is this yearning for freedom.  Real freedom.  Not the freedom from our own procuring, like sneaking out the house at night in search of exhilarating freedom, yet being burdened with guilt instead.  Not like a runaway slave who is constantly looking over their shoulder in fear.  Freedom in Christ is freedom FROM guilt and fear.  It is living truly free.  Free to be at peace with our life today and eternally.

My heart hurts when I see God’s children becoming slaves all over again to fear and guilt.  The very reason our freedom was bought at such a cost was so we wouldn’t have to be burdened ever again.  It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.  Did you hear that?  It’s like a slave being bought from the tortured life of slavery, being given every privilege of a free man, yet still beating themselves every night for old times’ sake.  It’s a mockery of what Jesus has done for us on the cross.  And it’s exactly where our enemy wants us to  be.  If we aren’t taking full advantage of our freedom in Christ, he wins.  Because his tactics are to lure us into self-made cages of fear and guilt.  As long as we’re in bondage again to fear, we are powerless.  Scared stiff.

I’ve been really convicted about being unafraid of doing hard things.  We all have hard things.  Everyone’s story is different.  We simply can not compare each other’s journeys.  We’re all running the race, and it’s a good thing we’re not all the same pace.  Just like running, though, the goal is not to quit.  On our journey, we’ve had some hard stuff.  Our hard has often revolved around health and money.  In fact, last month, the two year anniversary of our hardest battle yet, came and went without me even thinking about it!  I praise the Lord for a healthy marriage, despite unhealthy bodies.  More recently, our hard has been the climbing out of the pit we’ve been diving in and out of for the past ten years.  It’s because of the freedom we have in Christ we have been able to keep going.

Maybe Paul was a runner too, because he often referenced our life to a race. In a race, you’re exhausted, sometimes unsure of how to make the next step, and usually right about the time you feel like quitting, someone with a cup of cold water or a really encouraging word yelled in your direction puts a new strength to your legs and a renewed desire to finish well. 2015-09-08 12.13.17
We all have stories.  I actually made a short video about our journey so far.  I call it ten years condensed into less than five minutes.  Consider it a cup of cold water if perhaps you are going through a hard mile.  We’re not there yet, but I can fully and earnestly say, thus far the Lord has helped us!

First Day Fun

Today began our new adventure.  Our one-room-schoolhouse is now officially in session.  These beautiful kids were excited to start and did an amazing job!  We’re super excited about what this year will bring, and thankful to know the One who will take us through each day!  This is the first year I will have all five in a grade.  In case the comment is on the tip of your tongue, please know, I also can not do this.  Not alone, anyway.  I have a really big God who has promised to provide the resources to do what He calls us to do.  If that means teaching our kids at home, then He gives the strength, the joy, the patience, the creativity, and the desire to do so.  Praising the Lord for His great faithfulness, for strength for today, and bright hope for tomorrow, blessings all mine, with ten thousand beside…
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